Monday, May 20, 2013

bluenose marathon 10k

on sunday I ran the 10k portion of the bluenose marathon. correction - I walked the 10k.
was supposed to run it, was prepared to run it, intended to run it and.......didn't.

something happened at the start of the race that dictated how this was going to go and I couldn't argue with it. so a 10k walk it was.
sucks. I wanted to see if I could better my time from last summers navy 10k. now I will have to wait until august to see if I can beat last years timing.
I did manage to come in under 2 hours so win win in that respect I guess.

the weather was good, 0 degrees is a good run/walk temp.

as I was crossing the bridge on the way back, with about 2k left to go, I got what I thought was a rock in my runner. I kept going.
by this time I crossed the finish line I could barely walk. I got water, a medal and then into the metro centre to find a washroom.
the line up was long, it stank and there were only two stalls. seriously? all that space, all that capacity for people and you put two units into a washroom. I don't know how many washrooms the place has but you planned them badly.
I was pissed. yes, pardon the pun.

finally I got to take my runner off. it wasn't a stone. it was my orthotic.
they charge a fortune for them and then make them out of cheap crap that falls apart.
the bottom layer of the thing had come unglued and was folded back just behind my toes. so I had a slight ridge across the pad of my foot.
it wasn't noticeable when I walked but it was when I tried to run. and why run when I couldn't?
because I had been passed by nearly everyone who was running the thing and when an old man, who was overweight and stooped over, passed me I had enough. I ran for a while to get past some of the people and the pain in my foot got worst. I finished it walking.

I was passed by, fat people, senior citizens, fat senior citizens, fat senior citizens using poles and fat people who looked like they still had the sofa attached to their asses.
my cardio - it sucks.

after I got through the metro centers stinky ass washroom I sat down to inspect my foot. found what the problem was and a shiny new blister. I got out of there and hobbled down the hill to barrington street on seriously painful legs, waited about 40 minutes for a cab and went home.
first order of business was to break the blister and get rid of it cause by this time I could barely walk.

that bent back layer of the orthotic was enough to throw my gait off and so not only did I get a blister I got a lot of pain that radiated all the way up my left leg and into the hip area.

it was not a good time.

so in the end I paid $75 for a blister and a shiny object. they gave medals out to anyone who participated.

why did I do it??? because sailors love shiny trinkets.



Saturday, May 11, 2013

reseal?

I signed up for the bluenose marathon 10k this week, race day is the 19th. I'm not ready for it and I don't expect to get great time out of it but I'm doing it anyway. if I'm close to my navy 10k timing of last year then I won't complain. 
K bailed on me, she's not running the race. I understand why and I agree with her. I've found though, that running is the only physical activity that I like to have a workout buddy for. even though she runs better and faster than I do I like knowing she's nearby.

I took this past week off from weight training. I've been so caught up in training that I forgot about taking a week off every six weeks, no wonder I was a little burnt out.
I had a conversation with the boss on friday morning about fitness and running and taking a week off, blah blah blah.
somewhere in the conversation it became clear that I need to concentrate more on running and less on weight training right now. my cardio does suck.
I managed to go to the workout classes that work pays for but I took the week off from my own workouts.
my weight hasn't gone down this past week either. the number on the scale has moved but in the wrong direction.
gaining 4 lbs might have something to do with having taken the week off.......and inhaling an extra large bag of smoked ribs flavoured potato chips. those chip making people have a sense of humour. after I ripped the bag open I noticed they've now added a resealable tab to the bag. why would I need to reseal the bag? hmmm........silly chip company.

I watched a guy practice boxing at the gym this week, it was a hell of a workout. I remember my kick boxing lessons of last year, they were a good workout too. I'm thinking I should go back to it. soon. maybe kickboxing is to weight loss as the apple is to the doctor.
we shall see.

Monday, May 6, 2013

waste of time

some people are a waste of space and then others are a waste of time. such is the case with GiGi.
she wanted me to take her to the gym and show her around the weight room and show her my workout that I got from J.
J works at the gym, he knows his stuff.
GiGi didn't want to take the time to book an appointment and get a workout program, she wanted to take a copy of the one I had.
lazy bitch.
that was the first sign that I was about to waste my time. too bad I didn't fuckin listen.
I went to the weight room with her after my workout class and showed her the program, went thru it and showed her how to do the exercises. told her the important stuff, how to stand, how to do this, how to do that.
she wasn't the least bit interested. I said, "you know I'm taking my time to do this, you could at least try to look interested'
I don't think she was concerned much with what I thought either.

seriously. why do I bother?

I've taken people to the weight room before and showed them around and given them copies of my workouts. workouts that I got from the fitness staff, this isn't shit that I made up on my own. I wouldn't know how anyway. they've all been a waste of time too cause after that first day I've never seen them in there again.

last time a guy wasted my time in the weight room I swore it was the last. and I haven't bothered with anyone since then, I tell them if they were really interested they'd go see the staff.
I thought GiGi was different. I thought because she was a runner and worked out all the time she was actually interested and wouldn't waste my time. I was wrong.

trying to tell someone how to sit up straight or stand up straight is an effort that results in them NOT getting it right eventually and me getting a headache. stupid woman.
at some point I thought "why am I bothering with stupid?" and so I just told her "yeah, that's right"
she can break her back if she wants too. I won't feel it.

she had no more interest in learning a workout routine than I did in shaving my head with a cheese grater.

all she wanted to do was play tourist in my space and on my dime. I must be some special kind of stupid to have gotten caught in that trap again.

I told her in order to do a squat properly she'd have to keep her chest up and push her rear end back.
she wasn't interested in doing it that way. I pointed out some guy who was working on squats and told her why he was doing it right. she thought it was funny.
no bitch, funny was watching you trying to do a squat while holding your ass in.

never again.









Sunday, May 5, 2013

My middle name is k

This past week at the gym near killed me. It's left me to wonder if maybe I've reached that point in the aging process where I need to slow down.
The aches and pains are so bad that I booked in for a massage with the physio therapist on Friday. It started out ok but then I swear the bitch was trying to kill me. And I know everyone uses that funny but she seriously hurt. Then again maybe it's an indication of how bad the knots were.
It didn't help that I joined some health nuts in dockyard to run a 5k for fun that morning.
Well it was the Battle of the Atlantic run actually so it included a history lesson before we started.
And my time sucks. I wasn't the last to finish but time still sucks. I've signed up for the navy 10k as well, maybe my time will improve, we'll see.
And then for more misery I kinda talked myself into the Bluenose 10k this morning over coffee with K and GiGi.
What will this week at the gym be like? Maybe I take it easy, maybe I drive it again, maybe I end up gym road kill.......we'll see.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

I can see your underwear

Wednesdays class was so much better. There was a whole lot of running and push up shit and plank stuff, the kind of class I can get into. It was more my pace too, and because I didn't spend the entire time trying to keep up with someone else it worked out better. I had stuff to do in the weight room after class and so come Thu morn I couldn't move.
I mean I knew I couldn't move before I was even awake. My neck was in a crick, the pillows had shifted and I was in too much pain to get myself out of it. Felt like road kill that wasn't quite dead yet.
Eventually I managed to get out of bed.
I walked like a penguin for two days and its only today that i can move normal again.
Thu was a great cardio day, I got a lot of the kinks out and then she cancelled Fri's class. I'd like to have her job. So Fri turned into another cardio day.

There's been a lot of new faces at the gym lately, some big muscle head I've never seen before and a lot of new Barbie's.
You don't usually see couples at the gym but one just started. She wears  an underwear camisole with jogging pants. I cant figure out if she's waiting to see if this gym thing sticks before she invests in gym clothes or if she's stupid and really doesn't know the diff.

Monday, April 22, 2013

monday's class

today's workout class was thrown together last minute. and my bitchy ass mind didn't make that up, our super fitness leader said it was.
after 15 minutes of sweating she paused in the middle of the gym floor trying to decide what to do next.
while she's thinking, so am I.
I'd seen a kettle bell class last week and because I'm a magnet for stupidity, wanted to try it.
so I voted for kettle bell stuff.
no.
ok that's an answer.
super fitness leader says teaching that stuff is someone elses job.
you all have specific jobs. good to know. but I wanna try the fucking kettle bell lady.
maybe next week.
ok that's also an answer.
we shall wait until next week then.

class is 60 minutes long but between the set up and the stretch with a dash of disorganization in the middle, we get about 20 minutes of sweat time.
today was an excellent example of wasted gym time. oh well.

tomorrow is cardio day and because there's no class, and because I'm in charge of myself, I'm assured of at least 60 straight minutes of sweating.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Yugga

or as it's known to people who like it - Yoga.

just who invented this stoopid shit anyway?

it was a complete waste of a good hours workout time.

the most stupid shit I've ever done at the gym was done on Friday.

Friday's workout class was yoga. The room was hot, and not cause it was hot yoga, but because the room they put us in which was next to the pool was humid and hot.
my two favourite things at the same time, heat and humidity.

you know what else I hate? soft voices. I imagine it's meant to be seductive and encouraging.
sounds more like an idiotic passivist trying to convince children to see things her way.
to say it grates on my nerves is putting it mildly.

I could not for the fucking life of me manage to get from the downward doggie to the sprinter position.
well that's what I called it.
my knee would not go that far forward. might have something to do with the belly that was in the way.

I got bored rather quickly. when she said the pointer guy pose was called the warrior pose I lost it.
I hummed the theme to Superman. entire class started laughing.
then I felt bad.
she is trying to teach a class and my antics are not helpful.
however, at the following pose of the warrior, the guy next to me started to sing the theme to Surfin USA.
well not the actual name of the song but fuck it you get the idea.
I did feel bad.

and you get a ten minute nap at the end of it. you can lie down on that matt you just sweated all over.
that matt that countless yugga buddies before you sweated on.
I did try it. I got about a minute into it and then I sat up and stretched.
yoga lady didn't say a word.

after class she wanted to know what I thought of it.
since I disrupted her class already I thought I should be a little nicer. nobody likes a bitch for no reason.
I simply told her that "I don't think yoga is my thing"
wanted to tell her what a serious waste of my time this was and that if I had spent the last 30 minutes in an air conditioned weight room doing something for my fitness that really mattered I would be in a happier place right now.

Monday, April 15, 2013

make way, wide load

it'll be fun she said.
it'll be easy she said.
she lied.
I didn't believe her from the start. I'm not delusional.

I don't know who's idea it was to make a bike with a seat 3 inches wide when my ass is 3 feet wide.
stupid inventors. stoopid stationary bicycle inventors.
that was one of my workout classes. there's three each week, one on mon, wed & fri.
if there's gonna be a test at the end I'll probably fail.

and the woman in charge? she's not even a bitch.
who do I hate in this scenario?
life. it's unfair.

today is monday so you'd think I'd have more energy after having rested up all weekend. on the sofa. with the cat. and the tv.
no.

I don't think it's monday's fault, no matter how much I'd like to blame the day of the week for my lazy streak.
sad news is I have an allergy to soy and not only does it make your hair fall out it messes with your thyroid.
I'm not sure yet if my inability to lose weight this year is to be blamed on a now broken thyroid or if I'm lazy or if it's the day of the week getting me.
hopefully it's the day of the week. mon wed and fri look pretty bleak to me these days.
whatever the problem is I wish it would fix itself up so I can get on with this.

I got work to do.